Question: Why does he ejaculate too quickly?

“I’m a 37 year old woman who has just started a relationship with a much younger guy. He’s super hot, and I love his body, and most of the sex is good, but he cums way too quickly. He knows it, and we’ve finally talked about it, but I don’t know how to help him with it. Most of my boyfriends haven’t had this problem, but some have. How can he learn to last longer, and how come guys don’t just learn to control ejaculation?

Answer:

Even though premature ejaculation is considered the most common sexual dysfunction for men, the fact is we still don’t know what causes premature ejaculation. It is likely the result of many factors. And many people are misinformed as to what premature ejaculation actually is. The good news is that there are several ways to learn to control ejaculation.

In terms of the why guys don’t just “naturally” learn to control ejaculation, there’s probably several reasons.

Evolutionary psychologists would say that the goal of sex is procreation and therefore there’s no reason to prolong it. And it's true that we may be the first animals to want to prolong erections to prolong penetrative sex play (even though we aren’t the only animals to like having sex, or to make it a creative act). Not that I'm suggesting we listen to the evolutionary psychologists on this one.

A more simple answer is that no one teaches young men to control ejaculation. Children are taught to learn the signs of other reflexes. We teach them how to control urination for example. But when it comes to teaching young men ejaculatory control, I don’t think you’ll find it in even the most progressive sexual health curriculums.

Another possibility is that most men’s earliest sexual experiences are with masturbation (or even partner sex) done secretly and quickly, for fear of discovery. It is thought that these early experiences may condition some men’s sexual response to a pattern of rapid ejaculation.

Source: About.com

Erectile dysfunction, also called impotence, is defined as a man’s inability to get an erection or maintain it long enough to have sex with a partner. For some men, impotence means they are unable to ejaculate during sex.

Erectile dysfunction or impotence happens to most men at one time or another, but studies indicate that erectile dysfunction is more common in older men, so it is often associated with the aging process in men.

Occasional impotence is often not seen as a problem, but when impotence continues for awhile, it can bring on great emotional distress for both the man and his partner.

Common Causes of Impotence or Erectile Dysfunction

Erectile dysfunction can be caused by emotional problems:

• Worry
• Fear
• Stress
• Anger
• Depression
• Lack of interest in sex, or in the sexual partner

Erectile dysfunction can also have physical causes:

• Reduced testosterone level, which can be treated with hormone therapy
• A side-effect from some medications, including meds for depression, heart disease, high blood pressure and epilepsy
• An injury to the groin, or nerve damage
• Illnesses including kidney or heart disease, or diabetes, can cause erectile dysfunction
• A reduction in blood flow to the penis, common in men who have hardening of the arteries
• Overuse or abuse of drugs including alcohol, tobacco and recreational drugs
• A possible side-effect of some medical procedures, including prostate or urinary tract surgery

Source: About.com